“To tell the truth, I never cared much about Exobiology, although, like any Space Cadet, I had to study all that stuff about alien life forms. But when I get my degree in Cosmic Engineering I’ll look for a job in supernova seeding or black hole energy farming, so the only reason I came to this God-forsaken corner of the galaxy was that I needed some credits in solo navigation, and there are always plenty of openings in the surveillance program on alternative habitats.
The first time one of ours came out here most of the planet was covered by a thick layer of ice and not much was happening besides the usual random proliferation of inferior plant and animal species. The only relatively interesting thing was the presence of some tool-using bipeds who had managed to control fire and seemed to be developing more efficient methods of thought-exchange. Since at the time of this visit they used to wander in small packs, my instructions were to correlate their numerical growth with the foreseen changes in climate patterns to evaluate if there was any chance they could evolve a more stable social structure.
You can imagine my surprise when I awoke from cryosuspension to find that the my ship’s sensors were picking up energy emissions all over the spectrum. It didn’t take me long to get some idea of what was going on down there, though I still can’t make much sense of it all. The fact is that in the short period of four of our cycles, about the time it takes the planet to go round its star some 16,000 times, these bipeds had multiplied at a fantastic rate and were well on their way to controlling or eliminating all other animal species. As the ice cover receded toward the poles, billions of these creatures had taken over most of the solid surface of the crust in a totally haphazard way: in some places the conditions described in the previous report still prevailed, while in others they now lived in dense clusters, engaging in transformation activities and using some crude transportation and communication devices.
As I told you, though, alien life is not my strong suit. So, I just stepped up the data-collection routines sending several suborbital drones – which, by the way, created a lot of awe among the creatures since they could not identify the source of those flying objects. I first realized I had stumbled on something really big when my light sensors started to detect the double-flash signature of nuclear explosions, coinciding with one of the killing sprees that seem to be endemic in their culture. This must have caused some excitement at our mission control center because I was told to increase the close-range reconnaissance missions. Other atomic blasts followed, of increasing yield, but the real news was yet to come: also as a by-product of the mass-killing rituals these creatures built some primitive rockets and, before long, started using them to escape the planet’s gravitational field. You wouldn’t believe the contraptions they fly in, but the fact is that they had the guts to visit their only natural satellite and, later, have established a small permanent orbital installation.
Not surprisingly, people from the mission control center told me these creatures are evolving faster than any other intelligent life-form we have monitored until now. I’m sure that is what made them decide that enough was enough, for shortly afterwards I was informed that you guys were coming over with your special biological cleansing equipment. I know pretty well we can’t afford to have hordes of aggressive aliens messing about in space with atomic devices, but I feel a bit sorry it would have to end like that…”
By Jorio Dauster